There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.

Benjamin Disraeli (1804 - 1881)

USA Today has come out with a new survey - apparently², three out of every four people make up 75% of the population.

David Letterman (1947 - )

Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits that under analysis some of them won't stand up either.

Evan Esar (1899 - 1995), Esar's Comic Dictionary

Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.

Evan Esar (1899 - 1995), Esar's Comic Dictionary

Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.

Fletcher Knebel

I could prove God statistically³.

George Gallup (1901 - 1984)

A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic¹.

Joseph Stalin (1879 - 1953)