我从乡下跑到京城里,一转眼已经六年了。其间耳闻目睹的所谓国家大事,算起来也很不少;但在我心里,都不留什么痕迹,倘要我寻出这些事的影响来说,便只是增长了我的坏脾气,——老实说,便是教我一天比一天的看不起人。
Six years have slipped by since I came from the country to the capital. During that time the number of so-called affairs of state I have witnessed or heard about is far from small, but none of them made much impression. If asked to define their influence on me, I can only say they made my bad temper worse. Frankly1 speaking, they taught me to take a poorer view of people every day.
但有一件小事,却于我有意义,将我从坏脾气里拖开,使我至今忘记不得。
One small incident, however, which struck me as significant and jolted2 me out of my irritability3, remains4 fixed5 even now in my memory.
这是民国六年的冬天,大北风刮得正猛,我因为生计关系,不得不一早在路上走。一路几乎遇不见人,好容易才雇定了一辆人力车,教他拉到S门去。不一会,北风小了,路上浮尘早已刮净,剩下一条洁白的大道来,车夫也跑得更快。刚近S门,忽而车把上带着一个人,慢慢地倒了。
It was the winter of 1917, a strong north wind was blustering6, but the exigencies7 of earning my living forced me to be up and out early. I met scarcely a soul on the road, but eventually managed to hire a rickshaw to take me to S—Gate. Presently the wind dropped a little, having blown away the drifts of dust on the road to leave a clean broad highway, and the rickshaw man quickened his pace. We were just approaching S—Gate when we knocked into someone who slowly toppled over.
跌倒的是一个女人,花白头发,衣服都很破烂。伊从马路上突然向车前横截过来;车夫已经让开道,但伊的破棉背心没有上扣,微风吹着,向外展开,所以终于兜着车把。幸而车夫早有点停步,否则伊定要栽一个大斤斗,跌到头破血出了。
It was a grey-haired woman in ragged8 clothes. She had stepped out abruptly9 from the roadside in front of us, and although the rickshaw man had swerved10, her tattered11 padded waistcoat, unbuttoned and billowing in the wind, had caught on the shaft12. Luckily the rickshaw man had slowed down, otherwise she would certainly have had a bad fall and it might have been a serious accident.
伊伏在地上;车夫便也立住脚。我料定这老女人并没有伤,又没有别人看见,便很怪他多事,要自己惹出是非,也误了我的路。
She huddled13 there on the ground, and the rickshaw man stopped. As I did not believe the old woman was hurt and as no one else had seen us, I thought this halt of his uncalled for,liableto land him trouble and hold me up.
我便对他说,“没有什么的。走你的罢!”
“It’s all right,” I said. “Go on.”
车夫毫不理会,——或者并没有听到,——却放下车子,扶那老女人慢慢起来,搀着臂膊立定,问伊说:
He paid no attention — he may not have heard — but set down the shafts14, took the old woman’s arm and gently helped her up.
“你怎么啦?”
“Are you all right?” he asked.
“我摔坏了。”
“I hurt myself falling.”
我想,我眼见你慢慢倒地,怎么会摔坏呢,装腔作势罢了,这真可憎恶。车夫多事,也正是自讨苦吃,现在你自己想法去。
I thought: I saw how slowly you fell, how could you be hurt? Putting on an act like this is simply disgusting. The rickshaw man asked for trouble, and now he’s got it. He’ll have to find his own way out.
车夫听了这老女人的话,却毫不踌躇,仍然搀着伊的臂膊,便一步一步的向前走。我有些诧异,忙看前面,是一所巡警分驻所,大风之后,外面也不见人。这车夫扶着那老女人,便正是向那大门走去。
But the rickshaw man did not hesitate for a minute after hearing the old woman’s answer. Still holding her arm, he helped her slowly forward. Rather puzzled by his I looked ahead and saw a police-station. Because of the high wind, there was no one outside. It was there that the rickshaw man was taking the old woman.
我这时突然感到一种异样的感觉,觉得他满身灰尘的后影,刹时高大了,而且愈走愈大,须仰视才见。而且他对于我,渐渐的又几乎变成一种威压,甚而至于要榨出皮袍下面藏着的“小”来。
Suddenly I had the strange sensation that his dusty retreating figure had in that instant grown larger. Indeed, the further he walked the larger he loomed15, until I had to look up to him. At the same time he seemed gradually to be exerting a pressure on me which threatened to overpower the small self hidden under my fur-lined gown.
我的活力这时大约有些凝滞了,坐着没有动,也没有想,直到看见分驻所里走出一个巡警,才下了车。
Almost paralysed at that juncture16 I sat theremotionless, my mind a blank, until a policeman came out. Then I got down from the rickshaw.
巡警走近我说,“你自己雇车罢,他不能拉你了。”
The policeman came up to me and said, “Get another rickshaw. He can’t take you any further.”
我没有思索的从外套袋里抓出一大把铜元,交给巡警,说,“请你给他……”
On the spur of the moment I pulled a handful of coppers17 from my coat pocket and handed them to the policeman. “Please give him this,” I said.
风全住了,路上还很静。我走着,一面想,几乎怕敢想到自己。以前的事姑且搁起,这一大把铜元又是什么意思?奖他么?我还能裁判车夫么?我不能回答自己。
The wind had dropped completely, but the road was still quiet. As I walked along thinking, I hardly dared to think about myself. Quite apart from what had happened earlier, what had I meant by that handful of coppers? Was it a reward? Who was I to judge the rickshaw man? I could give myself no answer.
这事到了现在,还是时时记起。我因此也时时煞了苦痛,努力的要想到我自己。几年来的文治武力,在我早如幼小时候所读过的“子曰诗云”一般,背不上半句了。独有这一件小事,却总是浮在我眼前,有时反更分明,教我惭愧,催我自新,并且增长我的勇气和希望。
Even now, this incident keeps coming back to me. It keeps distressing18 me and makes me try to think about myself. The politics and the fighting of those years have slipped my mind as completely as the classics I read as a child. Yet this small incident keeps coming back to me, often more vivid than in actual life, teaching me shame, spurring me on to reform, and imbuing19 me with fresh courage and fresh hope.
1 frankly [ˈfræŋkli] 第7级 | |
adv.坦白地,直率地;坦率地说 | |
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2 jolted [dʒəultid] 第8级 | |
(使)摇动, (使)震惊( jolt的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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3 irritability [ˌiritə'biliti] 第9级 | |
n.易怒 | |
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4 remains [rɪˈmeɪnz] 第7级 | |
n.剩余物,残留物;遗体,遗迹 | |
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5 fixed [fɪkst] 第8级 | |
adj.固定的,不变的,准备好的;(计算机)固定的 | |
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6 blustering ['blʌstərɪŋ] 第12级 | |
adj.狂风大作的,狂暴的v.外强中干的威吓( bluster的现在分词 );咆哮;(风)呼啸;狂吹 | |
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7 exigencies ['eksədʒənsi:z] 第11级 | |
n.急切需要 | |
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8 ragged [ˈrægɪd] 第7级 | |
adj.衣衫褴褛的,粗糙的,刺耳的 | |
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9 abruptly [ə'brʌptlɪ] 第7级 | |
adv.突然地,出其不意地 | |
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10 swerved [swə:vd] 第8级 | |
v.(使)改变方向,改变目的( swerve的过去式和过去分词 ) | |
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11 tattered [ˈtætəd] 第11级 | |
adj.破旧的,衣衫破的 | |
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12 shaft [ʃɑ:ft] 第7级 | |
n.(工具的)柄,杆状物 | |
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13 huddled [] 第7级 | |
挤在一起(huddle的过去式与过去分词形式) | |
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14 shafts [ʃɑ:fts] 第7级 | |
n.轴( shaft的名词复数 );(箭、高尔夫球棒等的)杆;通风井;一阵(疼痛、害怕等) | |
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15 loomed [lu:md] 第7级 | |
v.隐约出现,阴森地逼近( loom的过去式和过去分词 );隐约出现,阴森地逼近 | |
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16 juncture [ˈdʒʌŋktʃə(r)] 第10级 | |
n.时刻,关键时刻,紧要关头 | |
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17 coppers [ˈkɔpəz] 第7级 | |
铜( copper的名词复数 ); 铜币 | |
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18 distressing [dis'tresiŋ] 第7级 | |
a.使人痛苦的 | |
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