Step 1: The Classic Spoon

第一招：经典勺式睡姿

Falling asleep in the 'spoons' position is likely to result in a trapped arm for 'Mr. Spoon'， as he will have less space to position the lower arm comfortably. It is his arm that will go dead, while his partner drifts off into a beautifully secure and comfortable reverie. The only merit¹ of this position is that 'Ms. Spoon' is likely to fall asleep quickly, giving you the chance to take evasive action.

以经典勺子姿势入睡，男勺子的手臂是很容易被女友压住的。当发现手臂已经发麻，他的爱人早已进入甜美的梦想，这个姿势的好处是，女友会很快睡着。你就可以趁机小无聊小猥琐一下。

To remove your arm without waking her, hold her close and gently roll her away from you, moving with her rather than pushing her away. Once she is re-positioned comfortably, roll yourself back to your original position and you should find you have the freedom to remove your arm easily.

怎样不弄醒她却把你的手臂挪出来，抱紧她，温柔地将她转个身，跟她一起转而不是硬推。等她换了姿势安稳地睡着之后，你可以自由地活动你的手臂然后回到你原来的姿势睡觉了。

Step 2: The Shoulder Roll

第二招：肩膀扭曲式

If the Classic Spoon isn't working, turn your body towards your partner and rest your upper arm round your partner's waist and your lower arm behind you. Your arm position means you are leaning on your partner for support.

如果经典勺式不管用，将身体转向你的爱人，将你上方的手臂轻轻环抱住她的腰，贴着床的手臂放在身后，这样就可以靠她的身体来支撑自己。

One potential issue is that if you are much larger than her, you might crush her, but at least you'll sleep well.

潜在的问题是，如果你体型比她大了好几号，她会被你压扁的，不过至少你睡得很香。

Step 3: The Superman

第三招：超人式

If the Shoulder Roll isn't comfortable, try a technique that takes a little forethought and planning. You need to position the pillows lower down the bed than usual. Now assume The Classic Spoon position, but move the problematic lower arm above you, under the pillow and out the other side so it is stretched over your head. You are now in the Superman flying position.

如果肩膀扭曲式不舒服，试试这种方式，不过要提前做一些小小的准备。你需要将枕头放下来一些。基本睡姿保持经典勺式，只不过把那个烦人的手臂往上伸，从枕头下方伸到头顶上方。这样，你就采用了超人式睡姿。

This has advantages- if you can't sleep you can pretend to be Superman. Or if this doesn't appeal, you can use the outstretched arm for texting, playing computer games or reading French poetry… all while she is sleeping.

这种睡姿还有很多好处，譬如说你如果睡不着可以假装超人，如果这个不好玩，你还可以用那只手发个手机短信，玩玩电子游戏或者读几页法国诗，而你的爱人睡的正香。

Step 4: The star gazer

第四招：四脚朝天睡

Legend tells of a really comfortable fleshy bit to the side of a man's chest. How fleshy and how comfortable depends on the size of the man.

传说男人胸前有一小块柔软的区域，当然能有多柔软多舒适，这样看男人的块头。

So take advantage of this by forgetting the spoons positions above, and lie on your back. Now encourage her to find your fleshy bit with her head, and use it as a pillow. Intimacy²? Check! Comfort? Check! This position could be a winner.

所以，忘掉勺子式试试这个吧。先仰面躺下，然后让你的爱人用脸寻找你胸前那块柔软的区域然后当枕头。亲密？舒服？这个姿势可是最棒的。

Please note that to increase the size of your fleshy bit, you may need to eat a lot of junk food and cut down on exercise. All for her sake, what a perfect boyfriend you are.

不过请铭记，为了保持你那块肉感区域的柔软，你需要多吃些垃圾食品少做些运动。这全部是为了她着想，这么好的男朋友哪里去找。