If you want to know how others treat you, the best starting place is to look at how you treat others.

如果你想知道其他人如何对待你，最好的起点是看你如何对待别人。

And if you don't like the way you're treated, there's only one course of action—to change your own behavior, because you can't change anyone else's.

如果你不喜欢别人对待你的方式，只有改变自己行为这一个行动路线，因为你不能改变别人。

Relationships function like a mirror--eventually that change will reflect back onto how you are treated.

人际关系交往就像一面镜子，最终你对待别人这个改变会映射到别人怎么对待你。

Here are nine important principles to remember about how to treat others:

这里5项关于如何对待别人的重要原则需要铭记：

1. Instead of judging people by their past, stand by them and help them build their future.

1. 与其通过过去评价别人，不如与他们肩并肩帮助他们建立未来。

Everyone has a past. Some are a source of pride, and others are best left behind. But whatever their past, people do change and grow, so instead of judging, stand by and support them as they move toward their future. Treat them with respect and make their journey your own.

每人都有过去。有些是自豪之源，其他最好留在过去。但是无论他们的过去是什么，人们确实在改变和成长，所以与其评价过去，不如在他们走向未来时肩并肩地支持他们。满怀尊重地对待他们并把他们的旅程当作你自己的。

2. Listen with curiosity, speak with candor¹, and act with integrity.

2. 带着好奇倾听，坦白地讲话并正直地行动。

Listening and curiosity allow relationships to thrive. Speaking your truth allows people to be honest with themselves and with you, and acting² with integrity keeps relationships on a high standard. Relationships need curiosity to grow, candor to deepen, and integrity to continue.

倾听与好奇让人际关系生根发芽。真实地表达让人们诚实地面对自己和你，并正直地行动保持人际关系在一个高标准。人际关系需要好奇来维持、坦率来增进、正直来继续。

3. Treat everyone with kindness--not because they are kindhearted, but because you are.

3. 友善地对待每一个人，并非因为他们心地善良，而是因为你是这样的人。

One of the greatest gifts we can give another is kindness. If someone is in need, lend a helping³ hand. Don't do it only for the people you like and respect--that's easy--but also for the ones who drive you crazy and those you don't even know. True kindness lies in the act of giving without the expectation of getting something in return.

我们能给别人的最好的礼物之一是友善。如果别人需要，帮一把手。不要因为是你喜欢或尊重的人才帮，那比较简单，而是要对那些使你发疯或者不知道的人也要如此。真正的友善在于真诚地付出而不要求回报。

4. Don't try to make yourself great by making someone else look small.

4. 不要试图使别人渺小来成就自己的伟大。

The moment you think you have the right to belittle⁴ others because you are better than they are is the moment you prove you have no power. People tend to make others feel how they themselves feel, whether it's great or small. If you can't offer help, support, or love, at least do everything in your power not to hurt them or make them feel small. Treat everyone you meet with honor.

你认为自己比他们好所以有权利贬低他们的时刻就是你证明自己没有权力的时候。无论那感觉是伟大还是渺小，人们倾向于使别人感觉他们所感觉的。如果你不能提供帮助、支持或者关爱，至少在你权力内做一些事情不伤害他们或者使他们感觉渺小的事情。尊重地对待你见到的每一个人。

5. Remember, everyone has a story.

5. 记住，每人都有故事。

It may be something they've gone through in the past or something they're still dealing⁵ with, but remember that behavior doesn't happen in a vacuum. Everyone has inner battles and issues. Withhold⁶ judgment⁷ and instead offer the consideration you'd like to receive.

它可能是他们过去经历的或者一些他们仍在处理的事，但记住行为不凭空产生。每人都有内在的斗争与问题。保留判断而不是提供你想得到的体贴。