Oh yes, but to be fair it was two against one.

是的，但公平点说，是被两个动物打败的，不是一个。

I was lying down on the couch enjoying a lovely piece of cheesecake when Marmalade the cat, who was not an overly friendly cat, jumped on my stomach and began demanding pets with the hand that held the last and most delicious piece of cheesecake.

我躺在睡椅上，享受着一块美味的芝士蛋糕，这时我那只不是很友善的猫Marmalade跳到我的肚子上，想让我用拿着最后一块最美味蛋糕的手抚摸它。

I was not about to have a hairy piece of cheesecake nor was I about to share. So I extended my arm far far away from the cat, so far in fact it was no longer even on the couch at all. My arm and the piece of cheesecake that was being held between my thumb and forefinger¹ were sort of dangling² in midair between the couch and coffee table.

我可不想吃粘了毛的蛋糕，也不想跟它分享。所以我把胳膊伸得离猫很远很远，远到胳膊都不在睡椅上了，我的胳膊和那块用拇指和食指捏着的蛋糕都悬在睡椅和咖啡桌之间的半空中，。

Out of nowhere like some sort of dog ninja our shepherd ever so delicately removed the piece of dangling cheesecake from my fingers and waltzed away very casually³. The suddenly needy⁴ affection-seeking cat pounced⁵ off me and followed suit.

我家的牧羊犬不知道从哪儿冒出来，像狗狗忍者一样很巧妙地把那块悬着的蛋糕从我的手指中间弄掉，然后很随意地就带走了。那只突然渴望关爱的猫从我身上跳下去，跟着狗跑了。

The cat and the dog stopped in the foyer area, the cheesecake hit the floor, and the two of them licked at it TOGETHER. I sat and watched in awe⁶, mouth agape. When they were done, they both looked my way and I swear they smiled.

猫和狗在门厅停下来，把蛋糕放在地板上，它们俩一起舔食起来。我坐在那儿，不可思议地看着，目瞪口呆。吃完之后，它们两个朝我这边看过来，我发誓它们笑了。

Yes, this guy got the better of me:

是的，这个家伙赢了我。

We were touring Australia at the time when we passed a kangaroo farm where tourists could feed the kangaroos and meet them up close. We thought it would be fun, so we bought a little bag of food and entered the fenced area where around dozen kangaroos, large and small, were going about their business.

我们当时在澳大利亚旅行，经过一个袋鼠农场，游客可以喂袋鼠，和它们近距离接触。我们以为会很好玩，就买了一小袋食物，进入了围栏区，那儿有10多只袋鼠，有大的有小的，都在各忙各的。

As I’m handing out food to cute little wallabies, this big ass⁷ kangaroo makes his way over to my position. He doesn’t wait for a handout⁸, he goes straight for the bag. So I take a step back, but he persists, so I take another step back, and another and another. I’m still giggling⁹ at this point and I can see my wife pointing and smiling at me from a distance. With my wife watching, I decide to stand my ground and gently push the kangaroo’s arm away from the bag. Big mistake.

我把食物递到小袋鼠宝宝身边时，这只大的笨袋鼠朝我过来了。它没有等我伸手喂，直奔我的袋子。我后退了一步，它还想要袋子，我又后退了一步又一步。这时我还在笑，我能看见我妻子在很远的地方指着我朝我笑。有妻子看着，我就决定要坚持自己的立场，轻轻地把袋鼠的胳膊从袋子上推开。但我真是大错特错。

有哪些动物非常聪明.jpg

I’m a pretty tall guy, but this kangaroo rose up, looked me straight in the eyes and then punched me in the shoulder. All of a sudden, I realize this creature looks like Mike Tyson in a very bad mood. I decide to turn around and walk away, but as I look behind me, I realize the kangaroo has literally¹⁰ cornered me. I’m fenced off on both sides and the only way forward is being blocked by 200 pounds of muscle that can break me like a twig¹¹. As I turn forward, the kangaroo’s face is inches from mine and he’s staring at me as if to say; “That’s right punk, now hand over the bag”.

我个头很高，但这只袋鼠挺起身，直盯着我，然后使劲推了我的肩膀，突然，我觉得这个动物就像很生气的迈克·泰森。我决定转身走开，但回头一看，发现那只袋鼠简直是把我逼入了死角，我两边都有围栏，唯一向前的路也被200磅肌肉堵住了，它打我就像折树枝一样。我转回头，袋鼠的脸离我几英寸，盯着我好像在说：“好，小家伙，把袋子给我吧。”

So that’s what I did .

我只能照做了。