When living out our daily lives, it’s often easy to blame the world for our problems.While it’s true that there are things in the outside world we can’t control, the biggest difference between two people is simply their reaction towards it. Having understood this for a while, I’ve often asked the question, “How?”

日常生活中，我们常常容易把问题归咎于外部原因。虽然我们的确无法控制外界一些事情，但人与人之间最大的区别是他们对事情的反应。明白这个道理一段时间后，我经常问：“怎么做呢？”

How is it possible to change your reaction to a particular event or situation?

怎么做才能改变你对某件事或某个情况的反应呢？

Why should you stop complaining? Here are three reasons that I believe—if you truly understand them—will help you move forward and live a less stressful life:

为什么你应该停止抱怨？这里有三个我相信的原因——如果你能真正理解它们的话——会帮你进步，生活压力也会变小：

1. The world owes you nothing

1. 世界不欠你什么

The world really does have nothing to do with you or anyone else. The planet will continue to exist without you on it, which—as depressing as it sounds—should also provide you with a first glimpse of the reality of what your life should truly be about.

世界真的与你或任何人无关。地球没你还是会转——这听起来令人沮丧——还会让你首先看到生活的现实。

Through this, questions start to emerge¹ such as: “If the world is irrelevant², who’s in charge of my life?” And, “What happens to my life from this point forward?”

明白了这个，疑问开始出现，比如“如果世界与我无关，那谁掌控我的生活？”，以及“从这一刻开始，我的生活会怎样？”

You suddenly start to realize that while we were nurtured³ and looked after as kids, this really isn’t the case once we’re an adult. The world doesn’t provide us with the same blanket of comfort as our carers once did, which only means one thing: It’s up to us to provide that blanket for ourselves and no one else. Which brings me on to the second reason…

你突然意识到，我们孩童时被培养和照顾，但成年后就不一样了。世界不像照顾我们的人一样给我们提供同样舒适的环境，这意味着一件事：我们给自己提供那种舒适，而不是其他人。这让我想到第二个原因……

2. You are in charge of your own life

2. 你掌控自己的生活

If you look back at your own life, you’ll begin to realize that everything you have ever done up to the present moment was all a result of the decisions you’ve made. Sure there may have been people around you who have convinced you to do some of the things you may have done. But it all ultimately⁴ depends on your decisions: So who’s really to blame?

如果你回顾自己的生活，会开始明白你到现在做过的所有事情都是你选择的结果。你身边肯定有人劝你做犹豫不定的事，但最终做决定的是你：所以真正负责的是谁？

You begin to see that amongst everything that’s happening around you, what you have is a blank canvas⁵. Suddenly, your hopes and dreams aren’t dreams at all but are within the realm of possibility.

你开始看到周围发生的一切，你拥有一块可随意描摹的空白画布。突然，你的希望和梦想不再遥不可及，它们有了实现的可能。

What are your dreams? What are your hopes and goals for the future? Do you have a plan? Start to think about what it might be and remind yourself daily that it’s all up to you to make things happen.

你的梦想是什么？你对未来有什么希望和目标？你有计划吗？开始思考它们并每天提醒自己：一切都是由你决定的。

3. You can’t be a leader if you behave like a victim

3. 如果你表现得像受害者，就不可能成为领导者

Would you rather live a life with rules, or lead a life that is governed by you? I’m certain the answer is simple.

你愿意活在各种规矩中，还是自己做主？答案肯定很简单。

It’s really easy to put blame on things that are external to you, as it avoids personal responsibility and allows you to refuse the possibility that you may have things that can be changed. So what can you change?

你确实很容易埋怨外部的事情，因为这样能避免个人责任，让你拒绝改变事情的可能性。那你能改变什么呢？

Being a leader in your life takes courage and requires the willingness to face your fears, experience failure, and take complete personal responsibility of everything that happens to you. I challenge you to turn the mirror on yourself and to ask yourself the following question:

做人生的领导者需要勇气、有面对恐惧的意愿、体验失败，对发生在你身上的一切承担所有责任。我希望你看着镜子中的自己，问下面的问题：

“What can I now do to turn my life around?”

“我现在能做什么来改变生活？”

You have no one else but you to make it happen.

没有人能改变你的生活，除了你自己。