1. Got into the gene pool while lifeguard wasn't watching.

他肯定是趁救生员不备，跳进基因池。

2. A room temperature IQ.

IQ值简直和室温一样高。

3. During evolution, his ancestors were in the control group.

如果进化时他的祖先不是在控制组的话，他也许不会这么蠢。

4. Has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.

他有两个大脑，一个丢了，另一个去找去了。

5. He's so dense¹, the light bends around his.

他太蠢了，光碰到他多要拐向走。

6. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.

如果他再笨点儿，就要一周给他浇两次水了。（把他当植物来看了。）

7. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, but he just gargled.

人家畅饮智慧之泉，他只是拿来漱了漱口。

8. It takes him an-hour-and-a-half to watch "60 Minutes".

他要花一个半小时来观察一个小时。

9. He sets low personal standards and then consistently² fail to achieve them.

他给自己设定的标准很低，但每次还是达不到。

10. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.

如果你用一分钱买他的想法，你还能拿到找零的。

From: http://www.hxen.com/oralenglish/cailiao/2015-05-12/388143.html