Upheaval¹ is all part and parcel of becoming a parent. But new mums and dads aren't always prepared for the huge lifestyle change that comes with the arrival of junior. Mum blogger and author Amy Ransom² has had three children and spends a lot of time with new mums thinking and talking about the experience.

即将为人父母，心情肯定很复杂吧？但准爸爸准妈妈并不一定做好了迎接生活方式发生巨变的准备，而新生儿肯定会带来这种巨变。博主、作家艾米·兰森有3个孩子，她大量的时间都在和准妈妈思考、谈论这段经历。

She met up with First Time Dads podcast presenters³ Steve Myall and Richard Innes to discuss what fathers can do to help mum and improve those traumatic early days. You can hear the full episode here: Amy also said aside from increasing their share of domestic chores new dads should also look after the health of mums particularly their mental health.

她与《初为人父》的博客主持人史蒂夫·梅亚尔以及理查德·英尼斯一起讨论：父亲可以做些什么来帮助妈妈、让这些创伤的时期更加美好。在此你可以听到完整讨论：艾米还表示除了增加他们的家务活，准爸爸也应该照顾准妈妈的健康，尤其是她们的精神健康。

She said: "Most new mums suffer the baby blues⁴ in the immediate⁵ weeks after giving birth but with post natal⁶ depression it gets worse. But it's not uncommon⁷ for a mum two years in to be diagnosed with depression. It's important for dads to be there for their partners as much as they are for the new baby. Things to watch out for are low mood, being teary, being lethargic⁸, not wanting to get out of bed and irrational⁹ thoughts."

她说："大多数准妈妈都会在分娩后的几周内患上抑郁症，但产后抑郁会使其更为严重。但当妈妈两年之后才被诊断出抑郁症并不稀奇。父亲经常性的陪伴在另一半身边、陪伴在孩子身边是很重要的。需要注意情绪不高、容易落泪、昏昏欲睡、不想下床、想法激进等问题。"

"The symptoms stay around. Not someone who is teary for a couple of days and then OK for weeks at a time. I do think dads are very good at picking up on it but think addressing it is incredibly difficult because they don't know how to do it."

"这些症状一直存在。并不只是每次落泪几天，而后正常几个星期。我觉得父亲十分擅长发现这个问题，但解决这个问题却十分困难，因为他们不知该如何去做。"

Amy children are now aged three, five and eight, has suffered for depression herself had some illuminating¹⁰ tips for new dads. She said: "Dads maybe scared of it and it could be a difficult question to ask 'are you ok?'. It could sound like a judgement about how good a mother is. I think it's important for dads to seek advice from someone in the friendship group perhaps, one of his female relations, or her mother if he has a good relationship with her."

艾米的孩子现在分别三岁、五岁和八岁，她本人患过抑郁症，她给了准爸爸一些令人启发的建议。她说："爸爸们可能害怕抑郁症，羞于启齿'你还好吗'这个问题。听起来像是在评论你这个母亲当的好不好。我觉得爸爸们找朋友圈的哥们儿、姐们儿或者自己的母亲（如果与母亲关系很好的话）汲取建议是很重要的。"

"If you are really really worried about it you should have a conversation with a health visitor or doctor because once someone starts getting help they get a lot better quickly. I remember I just wanted to hear 'you are doing a good job' and be reassured¹¹."

"如果你真的十分担心，那你应该与家访护士或医生聊一聊，因为一旦得到帮助，患者就能更快的恢复。我记得我当时只想听到'你做的真棒'、只想感到心安。"