Being kind to yourself in everyday life is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Life will become lighter1 and your relationships will most likely improve. You will feel happier overall. And your self-esteem and your sense of deserving good things in life will go up.
日常生活里,善待自己是你能为自己做的最好的事情之一。生活会变得更轻松,人际关系会得到改善,整个人也会更加幸福。你也会更加自信,更能感觉到生活的美好。
To make positive change with that simply start a new habit today. One of kindness towards yourself. You can find 9 such habits of self-kindness below.
积极地改变自己,以此为开始,每天培养一个新的习惯。这也是善待自己的一种方式。下文中你可以找到9种善待自己的习惯。
1. Invest in yourself.
为自身投资
Spend 30-60 minutes in the morning or evening with reading, listening to or watching material that uplifts you, that helps you to understand yourself and the world or that helps you to live a better life. Then, if possible, take one small action on what you have learned.
每天早晚花上30-60分钟时间读、听或看一些东西,这些能帮助你提高自己、帮助你更好的理解自己和这个世界,帮助你过上更好的生活。之后你要尽可能学以致用,哪怕是很小的部分也可以。
2. Find the truth and exception when an inner critic or outer critic attacks.
当自我否定和外部批评来袭时,找出事实和例外
Your own inner critic may not always say nice things about you to you. People around you may attack you or try to bring you down to serve one of their own needs. If you or someone else does this, ask yourself: what is the exception to this?
内心对于自己的评价可能并不总是积极正面的。你周围的人,也会出于自身的某种需要而攻击你或试图将你打倒。如果你或者别人这样做了,问问自己:是不是有什么例外?
3. Set a low bar for happiness.
降低幸福标准
Wake up in the morning. Relax for a minute. Tell yourself: “Today I will set a low bar for happiness”.
早晨醒来之后,先放松一下,然后告诉自己:“今天我会降低幸福的标准。”
The small things or what may be something one takes for granted becomes something I now often pause for a moment or two to take in and appreciate. This approach to the day makes life lighter, more joyful2 and it becomes easier to keep the motivation up.
那些生活中一些别人觉得理所当然的东西,我常常会为此停留片刻并驻足欣赏。这会使生活更加轻松愉快,更容易保持激情。
4. Unstress tonight.
今晚无压力
Take a long bath and read something to escape. Or talk to someone about something that is on your mind and let it all out. Set aside 30 minutes or more and be kind to your body and mind by letting the tensions and stress out.
泡一个舒服的热水澡,读一些暂时能让自己逃避现实的东西,找个朋友聊聊天,将一直憋在心中的烦恼全部释放出去。预留出30分钟或更多的时间,善待自己的身体和心灵,让紧张和压力远离自己。
平淡的一天?
Take one small step forward towards something positive. If your day feels mediocre or just sort of depressing then take one small step towards something positive to breathe new hope and optimism into your day and week.
向积极的方向迈出一小步。如果你感觉到生活平淡或实在有些压抑,就向积极的东西迈进,为人生注入新的希望和乐观精神。
Book or research a trip you want to take. Setup a dinner or a cup of coffee with a good friend. Look into how you can grow in your career to get new and exciting stuff to do. Try a new hobby.
预订一次你盼望已久的旅行;和好朋友共进一顿晚餐或一起喝杯咖啡;思考一下如何为事业注入更新更有激情的血液;尝试一种新的爱好。
6. If you stumble, be your own best friend.
如果遇到了挫折,做自己最好的朋友
Don’t beat yourself up, that will erode4 your self-esteem. Be a kind and supportive friend to yourself instead. Ask yourself: How would my friend/parent support me and help me in this situation? And then do things and talk to yourself like he or she would.
不要自暴自弃,这会损伤你的自信。相反,这时候要自己为自己打气。问问你自己:在这种情况下,我的朋友或父母会怎么支持我和帮助我?像他们对你那样对待自己。
And remember to ask yourself what you can learn from your stumble and if there is an opportunity in this situation. Then take that new knowledge you gain and move forward once again.
记得问问自己,你可以从这次挫折中学到什么,挫折中是否蕴含着机遇。然后从中获得新知识并再一次前进。
7. Take a laugh-break.
笑一笑,放松下
Take 20-30 minutes in the middle of your day or if that is not possible then use your morning or evening. Use your cell phone, portable media player, computer or TV and watch an episode of a sitcom5, read a funny book or comic or listen to a podcast you know makes you laugh.
每天中午抽出20 - 30分钟(如果没时间,早晚也可以),用手机、便携式媒体播放器、电脑或电视看一集情景喜剧、读一本有趣的书或者漫画,或听一个能让自己开怀大笑的播客。
8. Remember, the future is still in your hands.
记住,未来仍掌握在自己手中
And it is never too late to change. Don’t get stuck in thought loops that just go round and round about what you could have done or what went wrong.
改变永远都不会晚。不要总想着那些无可挽回的事情:我当时应该怎么做?到底哪里出问题了?这些想法都已经无济于事。
Think about what you really want in the rest of your life instead. Better health? A great relationship? New challenges in your career? What are a few small steps you can take towards that goal? Take one of those steps today. Then another tomorrow.
相反,要想想你的余生真正想要的是什么。更好的身体?良好的人际关系?职业生涯中新的挑战?想实现这些目标,你可以采取些什么行动?今天就开始迈出第一步。然后循序渐进。
9. Simply remind yourself of why is smart to be kind to yourself.
提醒自己:善待自己是明智的行为
By knowing the reasons why it is smart to be kinder to yourself it, in my experience, becomes easier and easier to be kind to yourself and to take the time for it every day.
要是你知道为什么善待自己是明智的选择,在我看来,这会让你觉得善待自己是越来越容易的事情,并逐渐形成习惯。
1 lighter [ˈlaɪtə(r)] 第8级 | |
n.打火机,点火器;驳船;v.用驳船运送;light的比较级 | |
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2 joyful [ˈdʒɔɪfl] 第8级 | |
adj.欢乐的,令人欢欣的 | |
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3 mediocre [ˌmi:diˈəʊkə(r)] 第9级 | |
adj.平常的,普通的 | |
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