Insanely, I wanted to go in. Wanted to walk up the front steps where Ali used to make Hassan and me take off our snow boots. I wanted to step into the foyer, smell the orange peel Ali always tossed into the stove to burn with sawdust. Sit at the kitchen table, have tea with a slice of _naan_, listen to Hassan sing old Hazara songs.

发疯似的，我想进去。想踏上前门的台阶，过去阿里经常在那儿，要我和哈桑脱掉雪靴。我想走进门廊，闻闻橙皮的香味，阿里总是将它们扔到炉里，跟锯屑一起燃烧。我想坐在厨房的桌子边，喝茶，吃一片馕饼，听哈桑唱古老的哈扎拉歌谣。

Another honk¹. I walked back to the Land Cruiser parked along the sidewalk. Farid sat smoking behind the wheel.

又是一声喇叭。我走回停在路边的陆地巡洋舰。法里德在车里吸烟。

“I have to look at one more thing,” I told him.

“我得再去看一件东西。”我跟他说。

“Can you hurry?”

“你能快点吗？”

“Give me ten minutes.”

“给我十分钟。”

“Go, then.” Then, just as I was turning to go: “Just forget it all. Makes it easier.”

“那么，去吧。”接着，我正要转身离开，“都忘了吧，让它容易一些。”

“To what?”

“让什么容易一些？”

“To go on,” Farid said. He flicked² his cigarette out of the window. “How much more do you need to see? Let me save you the trouble: Nothing that you remember has survived. Best to forget.” “活下去。”法里德说，他将烟蒂弹出车窗，“你还要看多少东西？让我替你省下麻烦吧。你记得的东西，没有一件存下来。最好都忘了。”

“I don’t want to forget anymore,” I said. “Give me ten minutes.”WE HARDLY BROKE A SWEAT, Hassan and I, when we hiked up the hill just north of Baba’s house. We scampered³ about the hilltop chasing each other or sat on a sloped ridge⁴ where there was a good view of the airport in the distance. We’d watch airplanes take off and land. Go running again.

“我不想再遗忘了，”我说，“等我十分钟。”当我们爬上爸爸房子北边那座山的时候，我们，我和哈桑，几乎一点汗都没出。我们在山顶奔走嬉闹，彼此追逐，或者坐在倾斜的山脊上，在那儿可以将远处的机场尽收眼底。我们看着飞机起降，又嬉闹起来。

Now, by the time I reached the top of the craggy hill, each ragged⁵ breath felt like inhaling⁶ fire. Sweat trickled⁷ down my face. I stood wheezing⁸ for a while, a stitch in my side. Then I went looking for the abandoned cemetery⁹. It didn’t take me long to find it. It was still there, and so was the old pomegranate tree.

如今，当我爬上崎岖的山顶，气息粗重，仿佛要喷出火来，脸上汗水直流。我站着喘了好一会，身子一阵刺痛。然后我去看那废弃的墓园，没费多少时间就找到了，它仍在那儿，那株苍老的石榴树也在。