Marisa had been married to Ben for nearly 10 years when they both decided¹ to go their separate ways. The split was amicable² and the couple remained friends but what happened when Marisa's best friend let her know she was developing feelings for her ex?

玛丽莎和本已结婚十年之久，而这时的他们决定离开彼此。他们和平分手，仍然是好朋友，但当玛丽莎的闺蜜对她说，'我对你的前夫动了心'时，事情又将如何进展呢？

The marriage was great in the beginning but we were one of those couples that grew apart as time went on. We spent a lot of time with friends, rarely did anything as a couple and when I lost my job and was unemployed³ for five months I realized Ben wasn't being emotionally supportive.

刚开始结婚时，一切都很美好，但随着时间的流逝，我们渐渐分开。很多时候，我们都与朋友呆在一起，很少有时间一起做事。在我失业没工作的时候（持续5个月），我意识到：本并没有在精神上支持我。

I felt like his love for me had really changed and he no longer loved me as a wife but more as a friend.

我能感受到，他对我的爱发生了变化，对我不再是丈夫对妻子的爱，更像是朋友对朋友的爱。

To tell the truth, I started feeling less for him, although I still cared about him a lot. We tried marriage counseling and after five sessions we had 'the talk' where we both decided there was no point moving forward and we should go our separate ways. It was very amicable and it was really just a great sense of sadness.

说实话，我对他的感情也开始慢慢变淡，尽管我仍然很在乎他。我们试过婚姻咨询，去了5次后，我们进行了一次"对话"，就在那时，我们觉得再继续这段婚姻已经没有意义了，我们应该分开。我们和平分手，各自悲伤。

Our friends and family were more upset than we were. But that's because, to anybody else, we looked like we were a perfect couple. My best friend Jenny was the only one that wasn't shocked as I'd confided⁴ in her many times that I wasn't happy and that Ben wasn't happy either.

我们的朋友和家人比我们更伤心。但只是因为，他们觉得我们非常契合。我的闺蜜珍妮是唯一一个没有被震惊到的人，因为我曾多次向她吐露我和本的不开心。

But to the rest of our family and other friends, they had no idea that our marriage was mostly quite lonely. So the split was pretty smooth and I was proud to say that Ben and I were still friends, which I know is a big cliché but it was really true for us. We still chatted on the phone every other day and caught up for drinks or dinner every now and then.

但对于我的家人和其他朋友而言，他们根本不知道我们的婚姻大多数时候都是名存实亡的。所以我们的分开相当顺利，我自豪地说我和本还是朋友。虽然我知道这是陈词滥调，但我们真的还是朋友。我们还是每隔一天就会电话聊天，时不时的约上喝杯酒或吃顿饭。

Then I started dating and met my boyfriend Matt. Out of courtesy I let Ben know I was seeing someone and he was a bit funny that I'd met someone so quickly, but apart from that, he seemed fine about it.

然后我开始约会，认识了我的现任男友马特。出于礼貌，我告诉本，我已经和别人约会了。当他得知我这么快就和别人约会的时候，他的表现有点搞笑，但除此之外，他觉得挺好的。