In the first year alone, my marriage was dealt some devastating¹ blows. During my separation, I sought refuge at my parent's house and went through a yoga teacher training that allowed me time for self-reflection.

婚后第一年，我的婚姻遭受了毁灭性的打击。我去父母家中避难，接受瑜伽老师的训练，有了自省的时间。

My ex-husband and I have been able to work through our differences and work together in the best interest of our children. This summer will mark three years since I finalized² my divorce from my husband of nearly five years. The process was expensive, painful, and in the end, one of the best decisions I ever made. But not for the reasons you may think.

我和前夫设法解决了很多分歧，为了孩子而共同努力。我和丈夫在一起五年了，今夏是我们离婚的第三年。这一过程十分耗钱、痛苦，但到最后，这也是我所做的最棒的决定之一。但原因可能并非如你所想。

Yes, I was happy to close the book on a painful chapter in my life and have an opportunity to get a fresh start. I celebrated³ by changing my hair color, dropping a few unwanted pounds, and starting a new job.

是的，我很乐意结束生活中这一痛苦篇章，能有机会重新开始。我重新染了发色、瘦了几磅、开始了新工作，庆祝新生。

我离婚了，但还是和前夫在一起.jpg

But what I didn't know was that along with everything else, my relationship with my husband would get a much-needed reboot as well. Today, my ex-husband and I are closer than we've ever been - literally⁴. In fact, we live together, raise our two children together, and even try to enjoy an occasional date night when we can. You may be wondering why we went through the trouble of getting married and divorced only to end up dating again. Well, it's a long story.

但我不知道的是，我和丈夫的关系却急需重新开始。而今，我和丈夫的关系比以往更为亲近--真的。事实上，我们生活在一起，共同抚养两个孩子，甚至有时间的话，还会出去度过愉快的约会之夜。也许你在想，既然现在又约会了，当初又为何费尽心思离婚呢。额，听我慢慢道来。

I didn't go into my marriage thinking it would end in divorce; though I have to admit the odds⁵ were pretty much stacked against me. According to a study by the CDC's National Center for Health Statistics, the probability of a first marriage ending in separation or divorce within the first five years is 20%.

结婚的时候，我根本没想过会离婚；尽管我不得不承认这种几率渺茫。疾病预防与控制中心国家卫生统计中心开展的一项研究表明，第一段婚姻五年内分居或离婚的可能性为20%。

Not to mention, just about everyone in my family gets divorced - that is if they ever get married at all.

更别说，我家里的每个人都离婚了--前提是他们都结了婚。

My maternal⁶ grandmother holds the record with three divorces to her credit. Without a first hand look at what it takes to make a marriage stick, I was left to piece together my own idea of wedded⁷ bliss⁸.

我的外祖母离婚三次，保持了家族离婚记录。我没有亲眼见过维系一段婚姻需要付出什么，所以原本以为的婚姻幸福却一败涂地。In the first year alone, my marriage was dealt some devastating blows. During my separation, I sought refuge at my parent's house and went through a yoga teacher training that allowed me time for self-reflection.

婚后第一年，我的婚姻遭受了毁灭性的打击。我去父母家中避难，接受瑜伽老师的训练，有了自省的时间。

My ex-husband and I have been able to work through our differences and work together in the best interest of our children. This summer will mark three years since I finalized my divorce from my husband of nearly five years. The process was expensive, painful, and in the end, one of the best decisions I ever made. But not for the reasons you may think.

我和前夫设法解决了很多分歧，为了孩子而共同努力。我和丈夫在一起五年了，今夏是我们离婚的第三年。这一过程十分耗钱、痛苦，但到最后，这也是我所做的最棒的决定之一。但原因可能并非如你所想。

Yes, I was happy to close the book on a painful chapter in my life and have an opportunity to get a fresh start. I celebrated by changing my hair color, dropping a few unwanted pounds, and starting a new job.

是的，我很乐意结束生活中这一痛苦篇章，能有机会重新开始。我重新染了发色、瘦了几磅、开始了新工作，庆祝新生。

我离婚了，但还是和前夫在一起.jpg

But what I didn't know was that along with everything else, my relationship with my husband would get a much-needed reboot as well. Today, my ex-husband and I are closer than we've ever been - literally. In fact, we live together, raise our two children together, and even try to enjoy an occasional date night when we can. You may be wondering why we went through the trouble of getting married and divorced only to end up dating again. Well, it's a long story.

但我不知道的是，我和丈夫的关系却急需重新开始。而今，我和丈夫的关系比以往更为亲近--真的。事实上，我们生活在一起，共同抚养两个孩子，甚至有时间的话，还会出去度过愉快的约会之夜。也许你在想，既然现在又约会了，当初又为何费尽心思离婚呢。额，听我慢慢道来。

I didn't go into my marriage thinking it would end in divorce; though I have to admit the odds were pretty much stacked against me. According to a study by the CDC's National Center for Health Statistics, the probability of a first marriage ending in separation or divorce within the first five years is 20%.

结婚的时候，我根本没想过会离婚；尽管我不得不承认这种几率渺茫。疾病预防与控制中心国家卫生统计中心开展的一项研究表明，第一段婚姻五年内分居或离婚的可能性为20%。

Not to mention, just about everyone in my family gets divorced - that is if they ever get married at all.

更别说，我家里的每个人都离婚了--前提是他们都结了婚。

My maternal grandmother holds the record with three divorces to her credit. Without a first hand look at what it takes to make a marriage stick, I was left to piece together my own idea of wedded bliss.

我的外祖母离婚三次，保持了家族离婚记录。我没有亲眼见过维系一段婚姻需要付出什么，所以原本以为的婚姻幸福却一败涂地。