Whenever we're introduced to strangers, we make snap decisions about them according to our first impressions.

每次我们结识陌生人的时候，都会根据第一印象快速对他们做出判断。

Whether they're attractive.

他们有没有吸引力。

Whether they seem like a decent person.

他们看起来像不像正经人。

How much they earn.

他们赚多少钱。

For most Brits, simply asking someone how much they're 'worth' financially is considered grossly impolite. Thankfully, most people are kind enough to drop several clanging hints about their relative wealth or successful careers. They're the ones who post on social media about flying to a meeting for work, or Snapchatting you a photo of their 'cheeky cocktail¹' from a beach in Tenerife. They're the ones wearing clothes with labels big enough to silently scream about how loaded they are and how well they're doing.

对大多数英国人而言，询问别人的薪水很不礼貌。幸好大多数人都很好心，能给出一些关于他们相对财富或成功事业的一些暗示，他们就是那些往社交网站上传一些打飞的去开会或工作的照片的人，或跟你分享他们在特内里费岛海滩上喝鸡尾酒的照片，衣服上大大的商标无声地宣誓着自己的阔绰和成功。

It's a worrying trend, and I'm not immune to it. I've felt the warm guttural glow of knowing I earned more than somebody, and the baseless grey irritation² of knowing that I earn less than another. I've 'checked in' to places when I know full well that anybody reading it will either get jealous or think I'm an arse.

这个潮流让人担忧，我真的受不了。我知道自己比别人赚得多了心里会暗暗窃喜，知道自己比别人赚得少了心里会略感悲伤。我也曾去过自以为比较豪华的场所，而且我明白，别人看到了要么会羡慕要么会觉着我厚颜无耻。

It seems as though self-worth is increasingly being tied to the careers we choose and the money we earn. A study in 2013, for example, found that nearly 17 percent of unemployed³ Americans were depressed⁴, compared to almost six percent of those who had a permanent job.

貌似自身的价值正逐渐和我们选择的事业还有赚多少钱联系在一起。比如2013年的一项研究发现接近17%的美国失业者很郁闷，相比之下有稳定工作的人中这个比重只有6%。

We need to stop placing so much value on what a person earns, and putting more on what they do. Don't get me wrong - being ambitious is not a fault, and achievements should always be celebrated⁵. But when a person uses their success to judge you negatively, it becomes a problem.

我们不能再继续把价值都附加到一个人赚多少钱和他们的工作上。你不要误会，有抱负本身没有错，成功也应该得到喝彩。但当一个人用自己的成功来否定你时，问题就出现了。

We need to stop thinking that somebody is worth admiring if they're filthy⁶ rich but stabbed everybody in the back along the way to get there. We need to consign⁷ the expression 'Nice Guys Finish Last' to the dustbin of history, by realising that being a decent person is not a sign of weakness but a positive and desirable trait.

如果一个人腰缠万贯但却在通往成功的路上对捅了所有人，那么我们就不要再认为他们很值得尊敬了。我们需要把“人善被人欺”这句话丢进历史的垃圾桶，我们要意识到做一个正派的人不意味着懦弱，而是一种积极优秀的品质。

If you want to know what you're really worth, here's a tip: It doesn't have anything to do with your bank account.

如果你想知道自己到底有什么价值，这儿有个建议：这跟你银行卡里有多少钱没关系。

It's about how many times you've been there for your friends. It's how many times you've been kind to a stranger. It's every time you did something unselfish, or told your partner you loved them, or treated someone with respect no matter where they were in their own life.

你的价值与你帮朋友多少次有关，与你善待陌生人多少次有关。价值体现在你每一次的无私，或者对爱人表达爱意，或者无论一个人在生活中扮演什么角色你都尊重他。

So the next time someone boasts about their wealth, remember that they can have all the money in the world, but they can never buy their way out of being a douchebag.

所以下次有人再吹嘘他们多有钱，记住他们可以拥有世界上所有的金钱，但永远摆脱不了人渣的本质。