Step 1: Dress the part

第一步：注意外表

Channel you inner glamour¹ queen: think Jackie Onassis, Grace Kelly and Natalie Portman. Your clothes must fit, show off your shape, and be spotlessly clean and pressed, so out with the jeans, sloppy² tees and Uggs and in with the skirts and high heels. Don't display too much flesh, and for jimini's sake, wear knickers - koochy flashing is not a ladylike pastime.

看看那些内在魅力无限的女王们：杰奎琳·肯尼迪、格蕾丝·凯莉、娜塔莉·波特曼。你的着装必须合身，凸显出你的身材，而且一定要干净无瑕、熨烫整齐，所以牛仔裤、宽大的T恤和雪地靴就不要考虑了，裙装和高跟鞋才是王道。别穿的太暴露，穿短裤可一点儿也不淑女。

Grooming³ is also crucial - in every area. Nails, hair and make up have to be immaculate. It's high maintenance, but as Helena Rubinstein said,“there are no ugly women, only lazy ones.”

仪表也很重要，不管是在哪一部分。指甲、头发和妆容必须要洁净无瑕。虽然打理起来很费神，但正如赫莲娜·鲁宾斯坦所说的，“没有丑女人，只有懒女人。”

Step 2: Encourage Chivalry⁴

第二步：鼓励绅士风度

When you are with your young gentleman, hold back a little as you approach the door, this will force him to open it, then naturally hold it open for you. Remember to thank him demurely⁵ as you go through.

当你和年轻男士同行而且来到门前时，别急着开门。这会迫使男士上前去开门，并很自然地帮你把门拉住。这时候别忘了优雅地说声谢谢。

When it comes to sitting down, use the same tactic⁶. If he takes his chair without holding yours out, stand just long enough for him to notice his mistake, then sit, keeping your knees together at all times of course. Smile, sulking is for petulant⁷ teenagers, he will be relieved you have brushed over his embarrassment⁸ and won't forget again.

当你们准备落座时，也可以采取相同的策略。如果他只抽出了自己的椅子而忽略了你的，你只需要站在那不动，直到他意识到自己的错误。坐下以后始终保持双膝并拢，并对他报以微笑。只有任性的小年轻才会生闷气。你对他的失误一笑而过会让他倍感释怀，下次再也不会忘记了。

Step 3: Talk the talk

第三步：注意言谈

All your good work could come undone⁹ if your mouth runs away with you, a lady doesn't divulge¹⁰ too much about herself or talk coarsely about the latest sexual position. Only swear if you absolutely must, try replacing offensive words with words like “Drat”, or “Heavens to Betsy”.

如果你管不住自己的嘴，那以上所有的努力都会白费。一位淑女绝不会对自己的事情夸夸其谈，也不会俗不可耐地去议论花边轶事。只有在绝对必要时才会轻声咒骂，而且要用“见鬼了”“老天啊”这样的词语来代替那些脏话。

Listen carefully and flatter him when appropriate. Never play dumb, if you don't agree with his opinions say so, but with a smile as you state your reasons to curb¹¹ getting drawn¹² into an argument.

要仔细聆听他人，并在合适的时候加以褒奖。千万别装聋作哑，如果你不同意他人的看法，说出来就好，但在表达自己的理由时记得面带微笑，这样就可以避免陷入争论。

Don't slouch, fidget, or drink too much - it's not a good look.

不要无精打采、坐立不安，也别让自己喝醉：这都会影响你的形象。

Ultimately the key to being treated and respected as a lady is to be cool, calm and in control at all times. And it takes a lot of balls to pull that off.

最后，想要成为一名公认的且受人尊重的淑女，关键在于冷静、淡定，并且在任何情况下都能自我控制。想要做到这些还需要多加修炼。