Doctor's Office:

Patient: Doctor, I think I need glasses.

Doctor: You certainly do. This is a fish and chips shop.

Library:

Customer: Can I have a burger and fries?

Librarian¹: Sir, this is a library.

Customer: (whispers) Oh, sorry. Can I have a burger and fries?

Classroom:

Teacher: Why are you late?

Student: Because of the sign.

Teacher: What sign?

Student: The one that says, "School Ahead², Go Slow."