Earlier this week, the news reported that a man in China got rejected after proposing to his girlfriend with 99 iPhone 6s. While most of us haven’t experienced the misfortune of being turned down in public (and losing almost $100,000 in the process), being rejected by someone we really like feels epically¹ bad each time, regardless of the circumstances. One minute you’re riding high on the tides of hope, and the next, you’re floundering beneath the weight of disappointment. It’s a complicated process. In fact, it goes something like this:

这周的早些时候，新闻报道中国一个男孩用99部iPhone 6s向他女友表白但遭到拒绝。尽管我们没遭过当众被拒的不幸（期间几乎失去10万美元），被我们真的喜欢的人拒绝每次都感觉很史诗般的糟糕，不考虑环境。你刚在希望的顶尖待一分钟，接下来，你在失望的海水重量之下挣扎。那是一个复杂的过程。实际上，原因像这样：

Stage 1, Denial: “Is this a joke?”

第一步，否认：“这是一个笑话吗？”

We’ve all seen those romantic comedies where girl jokingly responds “Umm….let me think about it,” after the guy proposes, only to say, “OF COURSE, YOU IDIOT” after his jaw² drops to the floor.

我们都看过女孩开玩笑的回答“嗯，让我想想，”的浪漫喜剧在男孩表白之后，只说，“当然，你在开玩笑”在他的下巴掉到地板之后。

Yeah, that’s probably what’s happening here.

耶，那或许是在这发生的。

Stage 2, Panic: “WHAT DO I DO, WHAT DO I DO”

第二步，恐慌：“我应该做什么，我应该做什么”

You’ve just made your intentions known, but it looks like the object of your affection ain’t feeling it. Should you ask why? Should you make a case for yourself? Should you scream “APRIL FOOL’S” and run away? For now, all you can do is mouth a half-hearted “oh” as they stammer³ out an apology.

你只是让她了解了你的想法，但是看起来你喜欢的人并没有感到。你应该问为什么吗？你应该为你自己找借口吗？你应该边喊愚人节边跑开吗？现在，所有你能做的是吞下半颗心的“哦”在她们结巴的说出道歉之前。

Stage 3, Anger: “HOW COULD YOU?”

第三步，生气:“你怎么这样呢？”

Now you’re pissed. How could this happen? How could you plan for so long, only to be rejected? Your friends all say you’re a catch. How could this person not see how awesome⁴ you would be together? WHY, CRUEL WORLD? WHY?

现在你醉了。这是怎么发生的？你计划了这么长时间，只被拒绝了？你的朋友们都说你很棒。这个人怎么没有看见你们在一起会有多帅呢？为什么，残忍的世界？为什么？

Stage 4, Paranoia⁶: “Is everyone laughing at me?”

第四步，疑惑：“每个人都在笑我吗？”

Well, great. They’ve probably told their friends what happened, and now all of them are reveling in the hilarity⁷ of your botched confession⁸. Why did that person reject you, anyway? Do they have someone else? You badger⁹ your friends for the inside scoop¹⁰ on this person, while obsessing¹¹ over their Facebook account to see if there’s something you missed. Maybe this was all a big mistake and they really do like you, but would feel bad ending their long-term relationship! Right? Right?

嗯，很棒。他们可能告诉他们的朋友们发生了什么，现在他们狂欢于你笨拙的忏悔。不管怎样，为什么那个人拒绝你？他们有其他人嘛？你烦扰你的朋友们因勺里的这个人，迷恋于脸谱网去看是否你拉下了什么。或许这是个大错误他们真的喜欢你，但是感到他们长期关系的糟糕结束！对吗？对吗？

Stage 5, Depression

第五步，沮丧

You’re sad. So sad, your Taylor Swift play count on iTunes has reached the triple digits¹². So sad, you completely bought out the MRT tissue aunty’s supply while crying over your lost love. So sad, you can’t help sympathising with YouTube “proposal fails”, regardless of how ridiculous or staged they look.

你伤心。因此你的泰勒 斯威夫特在爱团上的达到了三倍的数据。因此你完全买了姑姑的供给尽管因你失去的爱而哭泣。因此用一颗同情心帮助优酷上的“求婚失败”，不管它们看起来有多荒谬。

Stage 6, Despair: “I’m going to die alone”

第六步，绝望：“我要单独死去”

Now that you’re certain that you will die surrounded by cats, you’ve regressed from looping Taylor Swift to singing Celine Dion’s “All By Myself” throughout the day. People are jerks. You will never love again.

既然你确定你会被猫围着死去，你伤心的绕着泰勒 斯威夫特唱着席琳 迪翁的“一切靠我”一整天。人们是傻瓜。你不会再爱了。

Stage 7: Revenge: “He/she will regret this”

第七步，复仇;"她/他会后悔的”

Inexplicably¹³, you wake up one morning determined¹⁴ to reclaim¹⁵ your life, your heart, and your reputation – namely, by making sure the person who rejected you regrets it with every fibre of his being. As revenge, you will make yourself so desirable, that he will rue⁵ the day he or she turned you down. You cut your hair, sign up for a gym membership, make every effort to look as hot and successful as possible in case you see him.

费解的，一天早上你醒来决定声讨你的生活，你的心，你的名誉-也就是，确保拒绝你的人身体的每一处后悔。作为复仇，你自己是如此渴望，他会后悔她或他拒绝你的那一天。你剪了你的头发，签署成为一个体育馆的会员，努力看起来热和成功以免你看见他。

Stage 8: Regret: “What am I doing with my life?”

第八步，后悔：“我对我的生活做了什么？”

Eventually, you do run into that person. And hurrah¹⁶, you didn’t look like a total mess. If anything, you seemed totally unaffected by what had happened. But the high of sweet, sweet revenge quickly dissipates when you realise that this incident has basically taken over your life. Since when did love have the power to turn you into a crazy person? Shouldn’t you be over it by now?

最终，你追上了那个人。伴随着庆祝声，你看起来并不是很糟。如果可能的话，你似乎并没有被发生的事情影响。但是高度的甜蜜感，甜蜜的复仇快速的消散了当你意识到事情基本上占据了你的生活。因为什么时候爱有力量把你变成一个疯狂的人?到现在，你能结束它吗？

Stage 9: Moving on

第九步：继续前进

Slowly, but surely, you emerge from your cocoon¹⁷ of sadness and self-loathing to conclude that this person wasn’t right for you – and no amount of wheedling¹⁸, waiting, or manipulation will ever change that. As for the act of rejection¹⁹, people will forget about it eventually, even if you pulled all the stops to include balloons, flowers, and yes, iPhones.

慢慢的，但是确定的，你从悲伤的蚕茧和自我憎恨中总结这个人不适合你-哄骗，等待或操控不会改变它。至于拒绝的行为，人们最终会忘记它，即便你用东西包括气球，花，对了，iPhones来阻止。

Stage 10, Staking out into the great unknown

第十步，去探索未知的

Also known as that awesome moment you fall for someone else, despite how badly you were hurt. Your next grand gesture of love will be bigger, better, and more bombastic²⁰ than before (and this time, you WILL succeed).

众所周知你追求其他人的时刻是令人敬畏的，无论你被伤的多深。你下一个爱的姿势会比以前更大，更好更具爆炸性（这次，你会成功）