They spend a lot of time trying to dictate¹ your money.

他们总想支配你的钱。

One of the main issues that couples have is that of money. From not making enough to spending way too much, that seems to be a recurring² topic of conversation. Though some issues can be sorted out, if you have a partner that's always making your money a focal point of conversations, you may want to consider their motive³.

情侣常因钱闹矛盾。从钱挣得不够多到钱花得太多，这些似乎都是反复提及的话题。尽管有些问题可以解决，但如果另一半总是以你的钱作为谈话的核心内容，那最好还是想想他的动机吧。

"Coming together and having an open conversation about finances is great," Viciere told INSIDER. "It can get controlling, however, if your partner starts telling you what you can and cannot do with the money you are earning."

"面对面地、敞开心扉地聊一聊财务状况，这是很好的做法，"Viciere对INSIDER杂志说道。"但如果另一半开始告诉你，应该用你自己挣的钱做什么以及不能做什么时，这可能就是他/她控制欲强的表现。"

They try to keep you from those that you love.

他们试图让你远离那些你爱的人。

When you're in a relationship, you tend to spend a lot of time with your partner. Usually, your family and friends are understanding of that because there is a balance between spending time with everyone in your life. If you've started to notice that your partner wants you to only spend time with them thought, this is a huge red flag that something isn't right.

谈恋爱的时候，你和另一半总是腻在一起。通常情况下，你的家人和朋友会理解这种行为，因为分配给周边人的时间存在一个平衡。如果你开始注意到另一半只想让你的时间花在他/她身上，这就是一个严重警告：某些事出问题了。

"If you have established relationships that are healthy and your partner is struggling with this, that's a sign," Viciere said. "When someone is trying to control you, taking you away from people who love you will allow them to have complete control. Sometimes your partner may say certain negative things about situations with your family or friends. Be mindful of the conversation to assure you are not being swayed in one direction."

"如果你们享有健康的恋情关系，但你的另一半却纠结此事，这就是控制欲强的表现，"Viciere说道。"当某人试图控制你的时候，让你远离所爱之人能让他们完完全全的控制你。有时候，谈及你的家人或朋友时，另一半会说些负面的话。留心你们的对话，确保你没有被他/她牵着鼻子走。"

"If you are constantly hearing these negative things from someone you love, you may begin to believe it, and over time, may look at people whom you have always cared about as enemies. Make sure any conversations you have with your partner about family or friends are not geared toward negativity, but instead are more solution-focused."

"如果你总是从所爱之人那里听到一些消极的话，很有可能的是你会慢慢相信他/她，随着时间的流逝，你会将那些曾经关心过的人视作敌人。和另一半聊及亲人或朋友的时候，确保你们的谈话不要朝着消极的方向走，相反，你们更应侧重于问题的解决。"

They have a tendency to tell you what is "right."

他们总想告诉你什么是"正确的。"

When running into an issue in your life, the first person you usually vent⁴ to or discuss it with is your partner. "Pay attention to how they speak," she said. "Controlling people essentially⁵ want you to behave in a manner that pleases them so they will tell you what you 'should' do regardless of your feelings about it."

生活中遇到问题的时候，你脑海中首先闪过的谈论对象就是你的另一半。"留心他/她的说话方式，"她说道。"控制欲强的人总想让你的行为举止令他/她满意，所以他/她会告诉你，你'应该'做什么，而不在乎你的看法。"